I Have a Plan…

This weekend was a whirlwind of activities for my family – Rose Canyon Lake (our weekly fishing trip), a birthday party, swimming at Grandma’s house, dinner with out-of-town family – and it was all wonderful.  But sometimes all the activities and ‘stuff’ get in the way.  Sometimes it really is best to just slow things down and not have your entire day planned.  Of course that is sometimes easier said than done, especially when you are the parent of a child with Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD) or any Autism Spectrum Disorder – you have to have a plan, otherwise your day will most likely fall apart.   But, if you make your desired activities a part of your schedule, the transition should be fairly simple.  My son knows that on Wednesday mornings, we go to story time at the library.  Mondays are slated for the Zoo.  Our days are scheduled like crazy – I even have a spreadsheet that I printed out and posted on the refrigerator to track what we do about every 30 minutes for each day – but if you look, I’ve included things like “Boys play in their rooms -  mom has a break”, or “coloring”, “reading”, “puzzles”.  But, because we have gone through the effort to make things stable and predictable for our kids – things go a bit smoother when something else comes up.   It doesn’t have to be an extravagant plan to help you make it through the day – but trust me, it helps to have a plan!

Gone Fishin’

One of the wonderful things about living in Tucson is that it really is just a stone’s throw away from all sorts of wonderful, and sometimes hidden, gems.  One of these that we were able to enjoy this weekend was a trip to Rose Canyon Lake on Mt. Lemmon.  If you have not been here – ever or even just lately – you must go!  It was beautiful – 70 degrees, a nice breeze, and all the family-friendly times you could want.   We got up early and packed the kids in the car around 5:00 and once we got the gear and took the short walk to the lake it was about 6:00.  The boys enjoyed baiting and casting, and we did not so much enjoy the nearly constant requests to change bait, but we loved being out with our kids.  I have to toot my own horn a bit and say that I caught three of the four trout we brought home, too!  My oldest son caught the first fish of the season and of the day – and I also get to brag on him because he didn’t even use a hook or bait!  There was a fish stranded in the shallow sand-bar area and he used a small branch to land it.  He was very proud!  The boys bounced back-and-forth between climbing the hill behind us, playing in the sand, and fishing all morning.  We encountered many friendly ‘neighbors’ who were more than happy to tell you exactly where the fish were biting, and what they were having the most luck with as bait.  It was just an all-around pleasant experience, and we will be going regularly from now on.  Remember, if you do go please have a valid fishing license (none needed for kids 14 and under); daily limit is six per licensed adult, three fish per unlicensed youth (we obviously fell far short of that, but could have made it out of there with 18 fish!); you will need the Coronado Forest pass and it is $8 for entrance into Rose Canyon.  You don’t need fancy equipment at all – which we learned only AFTER purchasing all the lures and tackle – there were several “old timers” who were having great luck with just a hook and either meal worms or power bait, but please bring plenty of water, snacks if you need them, sunscreen, bug spray, and your CAMERA.  You will treasure images like the one I have of my kids holding up our string of fish!  Enjoy!

Sensory Movie On Saturday, June 16th

I have to take a moment to spotlight a company that is going the extra mile to accommodate kids with Sensory issues.  My youngest son has Sensory Processing Disorder and is being evaluated to confirm an Asperger's diagnosis.  One of the things that upset me the most about this is that it is going to make life so much more difficult for him than it will be already.  I worry that he is going to miss out on things that the other kids are doing because they will scare him, or it will be too much for him to handle.  That’s why I have to really applaud AMC Theatres for initiating a monthly “Sensory Friendly Films” program.  In a quote found on www.autism-society.org AMC states that “In order to provide a more accepting and comfortable setting for this unique audience, the movie auditoriums will have their lights brought up and the sound turned down, families will be able to bring in their own gluten-free, casein-free snacks, and no previews or advertisements will be shown before the movie.  Additionally, audience members are welcome to get up and dance, walk, shout or sing” (read the full article at http://www.autism-society.org/get-involved/events/sensory-friendly-films/)  I am thrilled to see more businesses making strides to include our kids in activities that their peers are participating in.  If you are able to, please try to make it to the 10 am (local time, nationwide) showing of Madagascar 3: Europe’s Most Wanted at your local AMC Theatre.  The more awareness to these programs that we can bring, the more programs will be available to benefit our kiddos.  Enjoy the movie!!

A Day at the Zoo

Ever have one of those days that doesn’t exactly turn out the way you had planned?  We were going to have a nice, relaxing morning followed by a trip to the library and then a leisurely day of arts and crafts at home.  That was the plan as of 7 am today.  At about 7:05, I got a text from a dear friend of mine inviting us to the Zoo with her, and I thought “yeah, that’ll be fun.”  Here’s the catch – she was going to be there when it opened at 8 (Thank you, Reid Park Zoo, for summer hours!)  Well, it takes about 20 minutes to get there from my house.  So, our leisurely morning turned into a frantic dash – scarf down some cereal for breakfast; everyone get your swim clothes on; pack dry clothes for afterward; sunscreen, water bottles – whoops! those were dirty; wash water bottles; throw kids in the car; drive to the Zoo.  We did get there on time, and everyone had a blast playing in the ‘Kenya Get Wet’ exhibit.  It was totally worth all of the chaos this morning in order to get there.  We love the Zoo and we are frequent visitors (probably at least once or twice a month, but usually weekly).  It is such a wonderful, local resource  - gets the kids out of the house, educational, entertaining, and you can always plan on something interesting to see.  Since we go so frequently, we do try and mix things up a bit though – sometimes I’ll pack a picnic lunch and after going through the Zoo we’ll have lunch in the park; sometimes we do the Zoo backwards (a big deal, and very stressful for my youngest son who has a Sensory Disorder and is on the Autism Spectrum – but sometimes it is a necessary evil); or I will ask the kids to find out what kinds of food each of the animals eats to see if we eat the same things.  Whatever you can do to enjoy some quality time with your kids, I wholeheartedly encourage you to do it! 

Stop the Insanity!

Some days it just seems to start out pretty rocky and then go downhill from there, doesn’t it?  Emotions and energy between parents and kids aren’t really synchronized – for instance,  my kids are high energy today and very playful, I am exhausted and cranky.  It seems like every few minutes one or the other of them is coming up to me crying about something his brother did to him.  Now, I’m generally a pretty fair referee – as long as they’ve been playing rough I don’t really dole out too much sympathy for minor injuries.  I mean, of course they’re going to get a bump or bruise when they’re having sword fights, right?  But at the end of the day, I will have a pang of regret – did I spend quality time with them today, or was I just trying to keep them out of my hair?  Did I let them know that I love them?  Were my words and actions edifying to them, or was I short and snippy?  Unfortunately I would say the latter today – I spent more of my time fussing at them than loving on them, and most of my actions were in response to an incident, rather than in prevention of one.  I could really be down on myself today – I mean, chores didn’t really get done, the fish I was going to make for dinner didn’t thaw in time, I should have done the vacuuming but I didn’t, etc.  I think it is good for parents to get to take the day off, and it is important for kids to learn a little self-reliance, it is good for them to figure out a way to keep themselves entertained.  Even though I may feel a bit of regret and write today off as being a wasted day – I can comfort myself with the fact that even though I may have been on a shorter temper than I normally am they still came to me for every little problem, and they were still apologetic when they disappointed me.  To me, that shows that they know that I love them no matter how irritated I may be; that they believe that I will provide what they need even when I don’t necessarily want to; and that they know that I have pride in what I know they are capable of doing.  All-in-all it is a fairly comforting thought at the end of a very uncomfortable day. 

Here’s wishing you all a great day tomorrow – and some words of comfort if it isn’t all that great.  I’m off to enjoy pizza and a movie with my very cranky family.  Strangely enough, I’m looking forward to it. 

"The Lazy Days of Summer"... Yeah, Right.

When I was a kid, I loved this phrase - it was everything I wanted out of my summer vacation. I was looking forward to staying up late, sleeping in, no schedule, hanging out with my friends - all the fun and laid-back times that you think of when school is out. That was obviously before I became a parent. There is a lot of work that goes into making things seem laid back! And now that we are in the full swing of summer, there don't seem to be enough things to keep my boys entertained. And that whole "no schedule" idea? Forget it. The other day I spent about an hour and a half coming up with a daily routine for our family. It may sound silly, but it has things on it like "play outside" (because if you don't get out there by 7:30 am, it is too dang hot, crafts, reading, and the all-important Rest Time! Currently I am working on a post while my 4 year old is taking a nap, and his 5 year old brother is having some down-time on the computer (per his schedule). We have been so very busy in the past few days - we had a trip up to Cabela's in Phoenix on Saturday after Gabriel's tee ball closing ceremonies. The boys love going to any kind of outdoor/sportsman's store - we always let them 'hunt' the trophy animals that are on display there. We were explaining to Graham that all of the animals used to be alive, but that a hunter shot them and the had the skin taken off and put on display. We were trying to convey the concept that he was looking at the real skin/teeth/antlers of these animals, but that it wasn't the whole animal there. He seemed to understand it just fine, but as we rounded the corner in one of the display areas, Graham noticed a statue of a man in his hunting camp. This is set on a motion sensor, so that when someone walks by it triggers a recorded speech about hunting and game conservation. Graham flipped out! "Mom! That man was alive! Who hunted him?! Why did they take off his skin?!" Poor kid. I forgot about that exhibit. And even though we have been living with a Sensory Disorder and Asperger's for nearly two years now - it does occasionally slip my mind that everything is real for Graham - if you tell him something, that is the concrete fact in his mind. Sometimes it works to our advantage - the kid won't go anywhere near an electrical socket because we've told him that he will get hurt - and sometimes it backfires. Like when he thinks someone has stuffed and mounted a person. Along with our trip to Phoenix, we have been doing some renovations around the house. What started out as a small project (replacing our shower because the shower wall cracked) has turned into something more. We replaced the shower, and then had to select new shower doors (which we ordered today). Because it had leaked, we also had to replace some of the drywall. That of course meant we need to paint in there, and while we were doing all this work, I decided I wanted one of those rainfall shower heads. I then decided that it wouldn't be fair for us to get a nice new shower head if the boys'/guest bathroom didn't have a new one as well. So that was replaced. We also replaced the counter top in their bathroom, because it had this weird piece that went over the top of the toilet - great for having a little more counter space, horrible if your toilet should ever break. So, that's gone, and now we have a regular counter top in there. But, the mirror that was in there was the length of the old counter top. So, that came down and we've had it cut down to size. I'm working on painting some molding that I am going to make into a frame for the mirror. I also had to paint that bathroom - since we pulled the old counter and mirror off, and the drywall was patched up. So, now it is a lovely peacock blue. To make up for removing the counter space, I stopped by Lowe's today and bought some wood and spent the rest of my afternoon sanding, painting, and building two shelves to hang on the walls. The last obstacle that I wanted to tackle in this bathroom was some decorations - it is my sons' bathroom, and I want them to be represented - but it is also the guest bathroom and I want it to be universally welcoming to any company that we have over. Anyway, the I figured out a great art project. Their bathroom is decorated in an ocean theme (whales, fish, submarines) and so we did some hand print art where we turned some of the boys' hand prints into some fish, a jellyfish, and an anemone. It's adorable, and I can't wait to finish hanging these shelves so I can get things put back together in there. I'll have to post some before and after pictures. Well, all that being said - Graham is about to wake up from his nap, Gabriel has discovered some new Lego toy that he wants to add to his birthday list, and the drill is fully-charged and ready to tackle shelf #2 before making dinner for the guys, jumping in the shower, and going out for Mom's Night Out with my friends. Lazy Days of Summer. Yeah, right.

No School Like The Old School

I'm not sure if I have mentioned it or not, but I am married to a hardcore, never-say-die gamer. I am pretty sure we own just about every system ever made (or have at some point in time - he traded up the XBox for the XBox 360, and I don't think his GameBoy Advance works anymore) and still have all the games for them as well. While tearing through the garage in a panic this weekend - yes, we HAD to find the headset/microphone for the computer so that we could still chat and coordinate our plans for playing World of Warcraft, even if we are in separate rooms of the house - we found the mother of all great games, and the source of some of my first gaming memories. Yes, that's right - Duck Hunter. Troy and I both enjoyed a chuckle while we dusted off the faithful old gun and that horribly angular controller. Little did I know that I was setting myself up for unlimited entertainment this evening. Gabriel and Graham were of course curious about this prehistoric game - "Why do you blow on the game, Mom?" - and we thought that we would introduce them to it - surely they would not be entertained very long by the techno-sounding blips and beeps and the very awesome 8-bit graphics. Wrong. Apparently this is the best game ever! I'll have to post some pictures soon, but it is just the cutest thing in the world to see the boys tethered to the game system by *gasp* a non-wireless controller, and tracking the ducks with that little gun. Gabriel is surprisingly amazing at Duck Hunter, by the way. He lays down on the floor in front of the TV - much like a sniper - and just goes to town. He'll hit every bird, usually without needing all three shots. I think Troy told me that the highest he got was level 11 - with a high score of 180,000. Troy has a t-shirt that has the original Nintendo on it with a caption that says "Classically Trained" - I'm tempted to find one in a size 5 :)

Oh My - Call the Police!

Because it should be illegal for parents to get sick. Especially moms. There is something so inherently UNFAIR about feeling miserable, missing time with your family, and then having to reconstruct your household when you are better, isn't there? I started running a fever on Wednesday, and have been sick ever since! Troy has done a great job of taking care of the kids - I mean, they're clean, they've had all their meals, and they go to bed every night after brushing their teeth. However, there are about 4 loads of laundry piled up around the house that need to be folded and put away - and they're only clean because at various points during my illness I crawled into the laundry room with the hamper full of dirty clothes and tossed them in the washer. The dishes need to be done; the trash needs to go out; we need fresh fruit and veggies; the 'business' side of keeping the house needs to be done - bills, mail, phone calls, etc.; we have appointments that we still have to keep - Graham has an evaluation by the school district tomorrow morning, and his OT appointment on Friday. On top of all this, I'm helping with VBS at church this week. Honestly I was feeling so yucky today that it just meant that I was a conscious, alive adult - I wasn't good for much else. But, I'm feeling better - I was able to actually eat something today! Food! Yay! Hopefully I'll be back to 100% in a few days. In the meantime, I am kind of enjoying all the pretty pictures that the boys draw for me to cheer me up, and being able to say "Babe? Can you...?" Troy had the day off of work today, and it is our anniversary, so we enjoyed going out to dinner (the boys were with Grandma and Grandpa) and then just being at home and relaxing. But all that relaxing and dining wore me out, so now I'm back in bed while Troy is picking up the kids. It has been awhile since I've been posting on here (sorry sorry sorry!) so I am using this time constructively before getting two very sleepy little boys in the jammies and off to bed. I think bedtime has to be one of my favorite times of the day - and no, not because they're asleep! I like putting them to bed - the snuggling, comfy clothes, nice and quiet mood around the house. I love the bedtime stories and songs, the cuddles, the requests for "just one more hug, mom" and Gabriel's recent phase of "Mom, I love you so much I can't let you go!" or Graham's requests for "Mom can you sleep in my room this night?" There is something about bedtime that just makes me feel like even if I lost my temper, or gave in and let them spend too much time on the TV because I wanted to be on the computer for longer, the day was pretty good - and we all know that we love each other very much. Here they are - Gabriel: "We got new Batman toys"; Graham: "Acid can burn you". Apparently Grandpa was telling them about Batman and Two-Face. Excellent bedtime material.