“Raising Boys” a poem by Roberta I. Teague

I found a wonderful poem today while browsing online, and I wanted to share it:

“I scrub the wall of fingerprints,

Pick up mounds of clothes.

I sweep the dirt that shoes track in -

Wish I could use a hose!

Meals are served from dawn to dark,

Dirty dishes crowd the sink.

Just when they’re washed and put away -

Everyone wants a drink!

The washer pulls the dirty grime

From pants worn thin and patched.

They look so very neat and clean -

Yuck, look what the pockets hatched!

Broken bones and bloody knees,

I should have been a nurse.

I take it all in shaky stride -

Just grateful it’s not worse!

Screams and shouts and arguments

Test the keeping of my cool.

They left the neighbor’s faucet on -

See their new front yard pool!

A soothing bath is ecstasy,

A reward at the end of my rope.

Raising boys isn’t really bad -

But first I must wash the soap!

A rose can say I Love You,

Orchids can enthrall;

But a weed bouquet in a chubby fist -

Oh my, that says it all!”

http://www.momsofboys.org/modules/info/quotes_about_boys.html

Expect then Unexpected

If there is one piece of parenting advice that I can give – it is to expect the unexpected.  You are never as prepared as you think you are – in a good way, or in a bad way – for what life will throw at you.

My example this week was a trip to the International Wildlife Museum.  I thought it would be great fun to take the boys out there (which is quite a drive for us, since we live East of Houghton) and let them hunt around.  They love hunting for things, which is part of what makes trips to the hunting/fishing stores such good fun, but we don’t make it out to IWM very often.  Well, I got us ready to go on Monday; small water bottles packed – we were going to be inside after all, and I was looking pretty cute.  On the way out to the Museum the boys were watching a movie on the DVD player and I was having a very interesting conversation with my mother.  So interesting that I missed the turn-off for the museum.  Well, there is really nowhere to turn around until you are through Gate’s Pass, so we pulled in the first scenic overlook there on just on the other side.  It was then I decided to change our plans.  We were so much closer to the Arizona Sonora Desert Museum, and we have a membership, and it was a nice, overcast day.  I convinced the boys that we should do the ASDM instead, and we would do the IWM on a day that would be hotter.  Miraculously everyone was OK with this idea.  So, we continued the drive and found a great parking space at the ASDM. 

Because we live in the desert, we had our bucket hats and sunscreen with us in the car and we headed off.  When we got to the entrance, we discovered our membership had lapsed – no big deal, we renewed our family membership and headed in.  We love the ASDM and do go there a few times a year.  But we’ve never been at 10 AM in July, and there is a reason for that.  The heat moved in as the clouds rolled out.  The boys had a wonderful time, but it really was more of a struggle for me.  I was hot, sticky, tired, thirsty (since we didn’t pack enough water, I gave mine to the kids and refilled my bottle at the fountains as needed, but I was very thirsty!) and grumpy.

Later that evening, I was thinking back on my day and how disappointed I was with my reaction to the circumstances.  The kids look back and think “Mom took us to the Desert Museum, and it was awesome!” but I have been looking back on it and thinking “I really could have handled that with more grace.”  My main problem?  I didn’t follow my own advice.  I let the change-up in our plans throw me and instead of adapting and rolling with the punches, I grumbled my way through some beautiful desert and amazing animals.  But you can’t dwell on the past too much.  Accept it, acknowledge your shortcomings, and move on, determined to try harder the next time around.  Today is our trip to the International Wildlife Museum. 

Today I won’t miss the turnoff, and I will make sure that I try to center my focus on spending time and having fun with my kids – no matter where we end up!

Pack Rats

Arizona has some pretty fascinating wildlife.  We’ve seen bobcats, coyotes, roadrunners, javelinas and hawks all from our back porch.  Some of the wildlife is amazing, like mountain lions.  Some of it is scary – like rattlesnakes or scorpions.  Some is just disgusting.  Pack rats are, in my opinion, disgusting.  Let me explain.  Every morning around 7:30 I send my boys outside to play before it gets too hot.  They jump on the trampoline, throw a ball for the dog, or just run around out there and get their wiggles out.  I take advantage of this time to do things like, load the dishwasher or the washing machine, or more often than not I am having a cup of tea and thinking about grocery lists and appointments.  One morning last week, they came in after just a few minutes telling me “Mom, it stinks out there!  I don’t want to play outside anymore!”  Being the sympathetic and believing mother that I am, I just pointed out the door and sent them back out.  They didn’t stay out – they came right back in!  This time, I thought I would investigate.  They were right – it reeked out there!  I spent an hour outside trying to locate the source of this mysterious stench.  We had just been fishing that weekend, maybe it was the trash cans.  So, I pulled those over and hosed them out and sprayed them down with cleanser.  I cleaned out the tackle box.  I scrubbed the cooler.  Finally I admitted defeat – something must have died behind our wall or something, whatever it was, it was nasty.  As I was headed back inside with the boys, I noticed the smell got worse near the dog house.  What on earth did she do now?  I leaned down and yes, the smell was very definitely coming from her house.  Maybe something died IN there?  Okay, everyone inside.  Dad will take care of this when he gets home.  Well, when he got home I went to show him the smell and we realized that it wasn’t coming from IN the dog house but outside of it.  Upon closer inspection – we had a pack rat.  Living in the space between the dog house and the patio door.  We set a humane trap, baited it with peanut butter and left it alone.  Bright and early (by that, I mean 5 am!) my oldest son comes running into our room shouting “Mom!  We caught the pack rat!  Can we keep him?  He’s so cute!”  Upon inspection, he is pretty cute.  Sort of fluffy, with a long tail and a little pink nose.  Upon closer inspection, he chewed through the dog house and stained the concrete where he was using it as his own personal bathroom.  So, cute, but not that cute.  We let the boys get a good long look at it, and then distracted them with some free computer time while Dad did away with our visitor.  The porch has been scrubbed, the dog house disinfected, and the smell is gone from the yard – giving us our playtime back.  All of this upset and chaos caused by one. Little. Pack rat.  See?  Disgusting.