Integrity

As you may have noticed by my lack of posting - we have been totally swamped around here.  Dealing with the funeral, all the visiting friends and family, and just coming to terms with our loss.  We finally decided that for the past 2 or 3 days, we would just relax and have some fun.  We went out to a movie, took oldest DS to a swimming party, while DH and youngest DS went to the park.  We went shopping, got a new family game, and have just generally taken a break from life for a few days.  But last night, reality came screeching back into view.  There were bills I had to pay; the dishes needed to be done; my ancient laundry-nemesis, Mt. Wash-more, was resurrected; and various projects and activities were demanding my attention.  As I was going about taking care of all this, I realized that my attitude was decidedly rotten.  Honestly, how many shorts can 2 little boys go through in a week?  We had about 20 in there!  Was it so hard for them to rinse out their cereal bowls?  It is disrespectful of MY time to leave them sitting there.  I don't have time to do everything I need to do, and they're not helping!  I haven't even had my quiet time since Tuesday morning!  *Light bulb*  There it is.  In taking a break from 'life' I took a break from my relationship with God.  Never a good idea, as He pointed out in my renewed quiet time this morning:

Be happy and rejoice and be gladhearted continually; be unceasing in prayer; thank God for everything, for this is the will of God for you in Christ Jesus.  Do not quench the Holy Spirit.  1 Thessalonians 5:16-19

Exhort bondservants to be obedient to their own masters, to be well pleasing in all things, not answering back, not pilfering, but showing all good fidelity, that they may adorn the doctrine of God our Savior in all things.  Titus 2:9-10

I am a bondservant of Jesus Christ.  But I have not been obedient.  Actually, looking at that verse, for the past few days I haven't been an example of much that is found in that verse.  It is completely fine that I didn't do the dishes or the laundry for the last couple of days.  The problem is that I allowed MY choices to ignore my responsibilities impact MY attitude toward my family and my relationship with God.  But, one of the things I love about God is that He is always ready for you to try again.  So, my prayer today is:

Lord, I am sorry that I have strayed away from you this week.  I was trying to rely on myself, and not relying on You.  Please forgive me, and help me to turn to you immediately in all things.  Please help me to be obedient, gladhearted and well-pleasing in all things to bring glory to you.
Amen.